lesson learned

Dear Jenn, here is some advice from a lesson learned...do NOT go out with guys who have on again, off again, girlfriend's.  No matter how much you think you like them, no matter how much you think they like you, no matter how much you think everything will work out...I am here to tell you, it won't!
C'mon jenn...I mean, REALLY?  Is it that hard to understand that there might be some baggage the guy is unwilling to drop for you?  He might have some good days with you, some days he hates his ex and is all there for you, but what happens when those days pass and he sees his ex and his ex wants you to the the ex and , well, then what?  You think the guy will always pick you?  Noooooooooooo, WROOOOOOONNNNGGG.  He won't.  He might at times, but he won't at times, and for that he doesn't deserve your time.  Go find a guy that doesn't have an ex, that doesn't have so much crap to deal with, that doesn't have drama and a smirk that will make you crazy.  Don't go there, the devil is there, the devil will bring you down, just say NOOOOOOOOOOO...ok?  I'm just sayin for future...I sometimes wonder if love is more painful than joyous at the end of it all...

  
                             The Devil Is Inside

The devil is inside, it is underneath, The devil is beneath all that dreams.

Once in a while
Once in a smile
A wink is a destined heartbreak
And will become my past I wish to erase.
With a wink, all can flutter away
From your eye to my heart,
Silence in the dark is
A plan from the gods to help me learn
What my soul knows.
And what I know is erased when that wink,
you’re such a flirt,
Takes me from my past, and into your mess.
I know what I know, but I’ll forget my sense
For once in this moment, I’ll let myself be
In bliss and ignorance like when I was born.
I’ll forget what I know in hopes
that I won’t grow
And the pain that I know, deep down,
will come.
It’s too hard to say no to you and your smirk
and what will be.
Pain I am used to,
And more lessons to come
That will say what I should have done.
The lesson, I think, for me in this life
Is to be able to walk away from something
not good.
And what about you,
What have you learned?
Never in school would I have come to conclude
That life is with one, and not two.
The math that I need only computes
I rather be WITH, than without a love,
I rather be a group, than one and above.
However old I get to be,
When death will overtake me
I will know I loved the rock and roll
I will know I loved your look, and man,
your smell
And then I’ll remember right before I go
That wink of yours that I knew too well.
And god will kill you too and your descend
will accompany me
And if I had to choose you or heaven,
it would be that wink
And once again, my mistake would lead me to hell
Cuz I know the power,
And the yearning wins over pride
And you and I would walk, hand in hand,
And to hell we would go,
And I would once again know
My soul would yell, my instinct would scream
And I would ignore it all because
YOU, are more important...
Me, I ignore.

~Jenn
ps...wishing happy thoughts, happy times on super bowl sunday :)